what summer means

5:50:00 PM

hello internet! and welcome to this little blog!

it took me a while to get started posting because i wasn't sure what to begin with...but i think this is right.

cally asked what summer meant and this is what came of that.

i was asked what summer meant to me

and i found i did not know

it was something i knew i knew

somewhere deep inside me

but i couldn’t remember

at the moment

as a child it meant

going to the beach nearly every day

{my parents called me a fish

because i would not get out of the water}

grandma’s birthday

wading in the creek

playing in the shade of the woods

as i grew older

the heat made me cranky

summer isn’t quite the same

when you live near the city

as when you’re buried in the woods

and returning to those woods

isn’t always so fun

but then

or should i say now

as i grew {am growing} even older

i’ve come to realize

i cannot spend these days

doing what i must do

to make them pass

i need to live these days to their fullest

because that is what they are meant for

i have spent these sunlit days

too much in discontentment

too much in fear

but i think i have found the meaning of summer again

it is the startling chill

that comes when i dive underneath the waves

for the first time that day

and emerge

laughing with glee

pushing dripping hair from my eyes

it is the roughness on my feet

when i come home

from walking in the sand

it is biting into a fresh tomato

and feeling silly when the juice squirts everywhere

picking blueberries and feeling the bucket at my waist

grow heavier and heavier

with promises of pie

it is pushing myself

to pedal to the top of the hill

so i can coast down

wind in my face

free

last summer was marked by

time spent laying on a cool basement carpet

punk rock music blaring from speakers

spreading mulch around with bare feet

and celebrating the end of a giant project

the summer before that

marked by learning to drive

learning to cosplay

and at the end of it all

an island trip

i miss that sometimes

i miss that innocence

but

i am older now

and wiser

my heart has been shaped

into something different than it was

what will this summer be marked by

when i look back on it?

what will i let it be marked by?

will i let it be marked by

feeling so busy i can hardly live?

will i let it be marked by

i can’t, i can’t, i can’t

the tears of exhaustion?

or will i let it be marked by

people gathering for celebrations

of completion of a phase of life

armfuls of books carried home

with promises of adventure in the pages

meeting a wee cousin

for the very first time

and the excitement to meet another

just days from now

lavender in the diffuser

picnic table study
in blessed morning quiet

pesto on everything

sprinkler runs with my favorite small human
laughing and tumbling on a water raft
and feeling as though i've got younger siblings

returning to the woods of childhood

and feeling peace

old/new stories

old/new friendship

i must choose

and i will choose

the better side

the side that aches

of sunshine

new things are coming soon

but while this summer lasts

i choose

to not take a single moment

for granted

and choose the side

that aches of sunshine.

i hope that wasn't too terribly long for a first post. please, please comment!! it'll make me smile really big and i promise to respond to every single one! it would mean several worlds to me that someone even reads this.

~

all these photos are from my iphone...because i'm lazy...but i'll have posts with legit dslr photos soon.

~

also i have to fix the time display on here because it's 3 hours early. whaaat??

12 comments

Cally DeclanAugust 10, 2016 at 8:17 PM
oh my goodness. summer is the sweet Voice i hear in the early morning when the birds are still asleep. bless you, sweet girl. xx loved this.
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K.A. EmmonsAugust 22, 2016 at 12:43 PM
WAAAAAT THESE PICTURES WERE FROM YOUR PHONE?? YOUR PHONe is magical. Your photography is magical

AND YOUR WORDS ARE MAGICAL BUT BEYOND THAT THEY ARE STARDUST. Stardust, stardust, stardust that is thick with meaning and experience and HEART. There is soooo much heart in your writing, which is reason #1 why I am SO happy and blessed that you decided to start this blog. I saw your reply on my blog and I am so so so honored that I could help inspire you to launch this beautiful space because the blogosphere needs to hear your beautiful voice and I need to hear it! I am enriched and inspired by the beauty and thoughtfulness of your words. Keep writing, keep going. This is beautiful. I am SO SO excited!

Kate
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UnknownAugust 25, 2016 at 11:32 AM
GORGEOUS WRITING!!!! Photos are beautiful aswell! How in the world do you get them so beautiful from an iPhone! Mine always look like a BLOB of nothing haha!
-Lauryn
www.ElegantChances.com
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UnknownSeptember 9, 2016 at 7:27 AM
Andrea- this is simply beautiful. I am so so glad you started a blog because your writing needs to be shared with the world. I think it's so funny that we both posted a poem about summer while neither knew about the other.
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RSeptember 15, 2016 at 12:01 PM
i must choose
and i will choose
the better side

gahhh I love that. so good!

(https://paxcontramundum.wordpress.com/ is my real blog)
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VanessaNovember 3, 2016 at 9:35 PM
WOOOOOW.....
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